Ironically, I can't carry a tune in a bucket. Yet, I have always been drawn to music. I spent hours making "mix tapes" - kids think iPod play list, but much more time intensive, and all based on the "luck of the draw" depending on what was played on the radio. I love making "Soundtracks" for various events, periods of time, and supplying music for things such as retreats. So, music has always drawn me in.
When I was younger and attended Protestant worship service, I loved the singing. It made more sense to me than some guy standing up front telling me what he thought about the Bible. (Even then I knew I wasn't built to be Protestant.) I went through phases, some were less glamorous than others. (Blaring Michael W. Smith's "Secret Ambition" seems cool when you are 12 and on fire with the faith, but it isn't.)
Eventually I started attending Catholic Mass, and again the music drew me in. Don't get me wrong, I am forever warped and have a special place in my heart for Christian Pop, especially harder Christian Rock, but those that live in glass houses shouldn't judge people with cheesy guilty pleasures. But the music at Catholic Mass took me to a new place. I distinctly remember a Mass during my junior year of high school, that to this day I view as one of my "looking back, I realize now, that I knew then" moments.
It was that day, that I heard the Sanctus and knew that I would be fully initiated into the Catholic Faith one day. (It only took 10 more years.) But it was the Sanctus in high school, and the Ave Maria. I remember more or less demanding that it be played at my Grandfather's funeral. I wasn't a practicing Catholic yet, in fact, I had just journeyed back to attending Mass at the time, but I knew it was a necessary element of his funeral, and boy am I glad that my naivety was correct; I am positive that it was the Holy Spirit, and not my own intelligence that pushed for it.
As I attended Mass more and more, and went through RCIA, I liked the music that I knew. It didn't matter what the words were, as long as it had some personal meaning to me. Songs like... wait for it, On Eagles Wings, were some of my favorite because I knew them, they were familiar, and they symbolized the Mass to me. But like every other "phase" I had gone through in my faith, I soon understood that there was more to the music than familiarity and pop appeal. There was a purpose to the lyrics and the style.
All this being said, as I started to study my faith, and learned that the Mass wasn't about me, but about God, I started to realize that the music I liked, that I often "grew out of" quickly, because it seemed juvenile and silly, was probably twice as trite and foolish to be used as a way to worship and praise God. Anything that sounded like it should be sung by a guy in a polyester-shoulder-padded sport coat, ankle biter jeans, and a mullet, probably wasn't the best type of music to have at Mass. I didn't really know what the "right" type of music was. I went to a parish for a while that had a very interesting Music Director. We sang more spanish than latin, and more Haas and Haguen than Aquinas. So what was GOOD music for Mass? Well, I finally got my answer when I wound up at a parish with an organ. I also learned it at my law school, where we had something called a Schola. As I learned songs like Immaculate Mary, Panis Angelicus, and the Agnus Dei something began to click. It made sense. Music wasn't a fad, entertainment, or for my liking it served a purpose at Mass just as everything else did. Sure bringing in a rock band might draw teens to a Lifeteen Mass, but did it draw anyone closer to the Sacred? I wasn't sure, which wasn't a good answer to me. I realized that we SHOULD be sure what we are doing, especially with music, draws us to the Sacred.
When I went to my first Mass or two, celebrated in the usus antiquior, they were the Missa Cantata. A form of the Mass that is SUNG. I attended these at St. Josaphat's Church in Detroit. I was in AWE. I felt as if I never wanted to go to a Mass again, where songs sounded like something that appeared on a children's TV show with a giant purple dinosaur. But was this vanity? Was this me desiring something for myself? I struggled with this question for a long time. I feared that I was less concerned with what God wanted at Mass, and more what I wanted. Maybe this was about preference and not reverence.
That all changed at my wedding. As we went over music, with an amazing music director, I made the comment, "I want music that makes sense to the CELEBRATION, I don't want the typical because it is what people expect. I want the music to make sense within the Mass." His response was, "I am glad you are taking this so serious, most people don't." He almost had to force us to leave, because I was being so particular. It was then that I realized that my desire for proper music was in the very least rooted in some proper theo-philosophy.Since moving to Alaska, the music situation has been much of the same. We use the Heritage Missal, as do almost all parishes in Alaska. It is pretty difficult, week after week to sing many of the songs. This is a VERY contemporary Missal/Hymnal and so it has very modern sounding music. Every week I hear songs, that when run through a theological filter, don't make sense to me. Yes, I know they are approved, but that doesn't mean anything. We have lots of Bishops, Priests, and Nuns that run around saying and doing things contrary to the teachings of the Church and they too are, "approved." That being said, I sing... not loud, as I am pretty tone deaf, but I sing, and I pray. I pray that next week we will have a good song to sing, and until then, the song I am singing will be made good through our prayer and love of God.
As a parting note, several blogs recently have written posts about music that I wish to share with you. They all lend something a little different and are worth checking out.
First, Fr. Longenecker has written and entire SERIES on Music. You can find them here:
The series is a MUST READ! He starts with an over-view on what makes a good Hymn, and dives deeper in the the musical selection, quality, style, lyrics, and purpose of music at Mass. Again, this is a must read. He sets up the series with a bang, and it really is a non-stop ride from that point on. Here is part of his intro:
"What people don't seem to realize is that there are actually some criteria for choosing good hymns. The fact that so many of the hymns in our Catholic hymnals are terrible musically, heterodox theologically, contain execrable poetry, maudlin sentiments and trashy pop psychology doesn't help. People need to learn that just because a hymn is published doesn't make it good. Furthermore, just because it's popular doesn't make it good."The Anchoress also has written about music lately. One of her latest posts concerns, "The Ten Worst Hymns?" She takes on the task of figuring out what the worst of the worst are. She has her own picks, but her main task is to direct us to Joe Carter, who put the list of 10 down, for all to see. She also links to Deal Hudson who did a similar project last year.
Now for those that think this is uncharitable, The Anchoress argues that "we must continue to complain until they stop [using these songs.]" So it isn't about preference, but a battle for the reverential place of music within the Mass.
I know this post was long, but I hope you learned something along the way, came to realize that we are all on a journey of knowledge and understanding, and that it is okay to re-evaluate our preferences and understanding of the place that music has in the Mass.
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